Posts filed under 'litigation'
How do you get a smart divorce?
Learn more about being smart about divorce with Deborah
Hear Deborah talk about The Smart Divorce
I was interviewed about The Smart Divorce and dealing with the many issues surrounding divorce with host Christine Williams of On The Line
Click on the link to watch the interview which aired on April 19, 2010.
You’ll hear a lot of information about getting through divorce, some personal stories, and guidance about the divorce process.
http://ctstv.com/ontario/player.php?ctsvidID=17595&show=On%20The%20Line
ON THE LINE with Christine Williams has been recipient of six prestigious international awards. The program features current affairs issues and in-depth discussions about a range of topics with authors, experts and advocates.
Add comment April 20, 2010
Breaking up, a 5 part series
Nothing is in this world is perfect, and certainly not the legal system. There are gaps in the system. The challenge is to work beyond the gaps…….as one lawyer once told me, the legal system was designed for criminals and, divorce is not a criminal act. So, given that perspective, I hope you can see why you should try to stay out of court. Of course, there are always exceptions, and at times, one has no choice but to litigate.
There was a 5 part series in the Toronto Star, investigating some of the issues people are confronted with when dealing with the legal system. What ever the issues, the bottom line is, there are problems, and that requires reforming the system.
I’ve attached links to the articles which may be of interest to you, my readers. While you might not agree with everything in these articles, it certainly will make you pause and think………the reality is, divorce is a life changing event, and we need to view this as a process, not a crisis. And, as I heard a lawyer so wisely say:
Divorce is a problem to be solved,
not a war to be won.
Here are the links to the articles:
Divorced dads can’t catch a break http://www.parentcentral.ca/parent/newsfeatures/article/704075–divorced-dads-can-t-catch-a-break
The good divorce http://www.parentcentral.ca/parent/newsfeatures/article/705130–the-good-divorce
Kids hard hit in nasty divorces http://www.parentcentral.ca/parent/newsfeatures/article/705251–kids-hard-hit-in-nasty-divorces
Grandparents go to court for access to grandkids
Where separation occurs without anxiety http://www.parentcentral.ca/parent/newsfeatures/article/706400–where-separation-occurs-without-anxiety
Of course, I always like to have the last word and comment. My published letter to the editor, in response to the article entitled “Divorced dads can’t catch a break”, is below.
What’s the delay on shared custody?
Re: Breaking up: Family courts in crisis, Series
There are gaps in the legal system, leading to both fathers and mothers feeling that they are being treated unfairly. But, the real victims are the children who are losing out on a loving relationship with both parents, because of their parents’ conflict – who are too consumed with fighting each other, ignoring what’s in their children’s best interest.
Parents need to work together for the sake of the children, not against each other for vengeance, control and destruction of their ex partner.
Deborah Moskovitch, Divorce Consultant, Author, “The Smart Divorce”
Add comment October 18, 2009
Here comes the judge………what he has to say
For an insightful perspective of what goes on in the family courtroom, the video attached is a must see for anyone in the throes of divorce. Why is it so important to stay out of court – because you want to avoid the tug of war between parents and the disastrous effects it can have on children
Watch this captivating interview with Susan Ormiston who talks to family court judge, Justice Harvey Brownstone, who has spent 14 years refereeing ugly custody disputes, writing a book detailing his experiences on the bench.
http://www.cbc.ca/national/blog/video/crimejustice/tug_of_war_extended_interview.html
If this isn’t enough to keep you out of court, then read this powerful research by Dr. Robert E. Emery. Dr. Emery conducted a 12 year study on high conflict families — who had originally appeared in court because they had filed for a contested custody hearing. He compared two groups – those that litigated the outcome vs mediation.
The outcome:
5 hours of mediation caused nonresidential parents to see their children much more often 12 years later
Compare these rates to the dramatic drop off in contact after the typical divorce in America
For example, 28% of nonresident parents who mediated saw their children weekly 12 years later compared to 9% who litigated and 11% in the national averages
For more information and a full review of the study, click on the link
http://emeryondivorce.com/divorce_mediation_study.php
Our goal as parents is to put our children’s best interest first. It isn’t always easy, but it’s a goal we need to achieve!
Add comment July 20, 2009
Nurturing parent/child bonds
The issue of parent alienation has been front and center in the media recently, and deserves the attention. It’s the children who live out the divorce and deal with the toxic reality of conflict.
Justice Harvey Brownstone, a family court judge in Toronto, wrote an insightful essay which appears in The Globe and Mail, on what he described as “a prevalent concern in high-conflict custody litigation.” The link to this article, which every parent should read, is below.
Justice Brownstone raises significant issues which parents need to consider. However, it is important for parents to look at their own behavior and consider how this might be affecting the relationship with their children.
My response to this serious issue of parent/child relationships appears in today’s Globe and Mail – letters to the editor.
If you are wondering whether or not my comments ring true, read on for a real life example of someone who paid the price dearly, and suffered significant damage as a result of parent alienation.
It’s a parent’s responsibility to give their children the best life possible -this means being mature enough to
put your feelings aside
and do what is in the best interests of your children.
Add comment April 28, 2009
The Smart Divorce Workshop Series – Space Still Available
The Smart Divorce® Workshop Series
These workshops are appropriate for individuals contemplating or already experiencing a divorce. Strategies for reducing financial costs and personal turmoil will be presented. Participants will learn what to expect legally and emotionally, and so be able to move through the process with confidence and focus while saving time and money. A subsequent session will address parenting issues, how to work with parenting experts more effectively, and available resources. Feedback from therapists and lawyers has indicated that The Smart Divorce Workshops have helped to prepare individuals for the process and make them better clients.
I have added two new workshops to the series called – Taking Control of Your Finances – with guest speakers Atsuko Hiroaka and Aaron Nimon, both Investment Advisors of BMO Nesbit Burns. The focus of these sessions is to help manage and effectively deal with your financial concerns; how to overcome your fears and understand the financial considerations as you work through the divorce process and postdivorce concerns.
Click on the link for more information: the-smart-divorce-workshop-f09-2-finr1
Program details:
The Smart Divorce: Learning the Basics – February 4, 2009
The Smart Divorce: Taking Control of Your Finances – February 11, 2009
with Guest Speaker, Investment Advisor – Aaron Nimon of BMO Nesbit Burns
The Smart Divorce: Parenting Through Divorce – February 18, 2009 2008
The Smart Divorce: Taking Control of Your Finances – February 25, 2009
with Guest Speaker, Investment Advisor – Atsuko Hiroaka of BMO Nesbit Burns
“Your seminar game the confidence I needed to start my divorce. I know what to do now and feel I’m not alone.” Dave C. Toronto
“I met a client who took your seminar today. An educated client makes this work so much easier!” Jacqueline Vanbetlehem, Mediator and Family Therapist in Oakville
Location: 12 Lawton Boulevard, Toronto (Yonge and St. Clair)
Registration Fee: $25 per workshop
Call The Smart Divorce at 905 695 0270 or email info@thesmartdivorce.com
SPACES ARE LIMITED, CALL TODAY
2 comments January 30, 2009
