Taking the doom and gloom out of the divorce process can sound like a daunting process. But, it need not be if you are smart about your divorce.
With a smart divorce, you realize that the pain of divorce can be lessened dramatically by properly handling the competing emotional and legal sides of divorce. And, that you deal with the emotional side of divorce outside of the legal system. If you are able to do this then you are more likely to gain perspective on your legal options early on; this will assist you in making informed decisions, protect you from the damage that uncontrolled emotions can cause; and guide you in meeting your children’s best interest.
Being smart about divorce also means arming yourself with knowledge about the divorce process. There are many ways to research divorce. Here are a few ways that I can help you navigate the divorce process:
- Reading the book, The Smart Divorce – available at amazon.com, amazon.ca, barnesandnoble.com and wherever books are sold.
- My One-on-One divorce consulting can help you think strategically about the divorce process. one_on_one_consulting-pdf
- Enrolling in one of The Smart Divorce workshops.
There was a recent article in The Toronto Star which outlines the benefits of The Smart Divorce workshops. http://www.thestar.com/Comment/article/541734
If you think that any of this would be helpful for you, please don’t hesitate to contact me at info@thesmartdivorce.com
Wishing you all the best during this difficult time,
Deborah
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November 25, 2008 at 12:34 am
New workshops have been added:
Limited space is available in The Smart Divorce® Workshops. These workshops are appropriate for individuals contemplating or already experiencing a divorce. Strategies for reducing financial costs and personal turmoil will be presented. Participants will learn what to expect legally and emotionally, and so be able to move through the process with confidence and focus while saving time and money. A subsequent session will address parenting issues, how to work with parenting experts more effectively, and available resources. Feedback from therapists and lawyers has indicated that The Smart Divorce Workshops have helped to prepare individuals for the process and make them better clients; while saving them time money – and their sanity.
Program details:
The Smart Divorce: Learning the Basics –
September 16, 2008
The Smart Divorce: Parenting Through Divorce –
September 23, 2008
Time: 7:30 – 9 pm
Location: 12 Lawton Boulevard, Toronto
(Yonge and St. Clair)
For more details, click on the pdf file below:
the-smart-divorce-workshop-invitation-sep08-pdf
If you feel that you could benefit from these workshops or for more information please contact Deborah Moskovitch at 905 695 0270 or by email at info@thesmartdivorce.com.
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July 10, 2008 at 6:40 pm
Considering All the Divorce Options
Did you know that there are options to arriving at your separation agreement? Going into my divorce, I didn’t realize there were any options. Maybe I watched too much TV, but my perception was that everyone went to court and litigated–went to trial before a judge. I was completely wrong. I didn’t understand that litigation is not the preferred method of resolution. All lawyers would agree that in most situations, it is the method of last resort; it usually signals a breakdown in negotiations outside the courtroom. The other options besides litigation are called alternative dispute resolutions, or ADRs.
The best-practices thinking is that ADR ought to mean
“appropriate dispute resolution,”
of which litigation is one choice.
Understanding each ADR process is vitally important. Although no one should walk into a lawyer’s office and immediately say, “I want dispute resolution X”–lawyers evaluate which dispute resolution process to pursue based on the nature of the problems and issues–being aware of your choices can help you maintain control and contribute to making decisions with confidence.
Which option provides the best outcome?
All of these modalities can produce either a good outcome or a bad one. Mediation, arbitration, trial–nothing about them, alone, predicts either a good or bad outcome. All carry variables such as a good judge or a bad judge, a good mediator or a bad mediator, a good lawyer or a bad lawyer.
There are five ways to come up with your separation agreement without going to court. You should be well informed about these when considering the best way to arrive at your separation agreement. Why does this matter? It matters because it’s not always about going to court.
The truth is, there is no such thing as revenge in divorce, the only thing you will get are legal bills.
What are your choices and options?
- Do-it-yourself
- Negotiation
- Mediation
- Collaborative family law
- Arbitration
- Litigation
Which Option Is Right for You?
Even choosing which dispute resolution option to take can become a fight for a divorcing couple. Don’t invest yourself in particular outcomes. Your goal should be as reasonable a dissolution of your marriage as possible under the circumstances. You do not have–and you will not be able to get–complete control of the options or of how the other side acts within them.
A good lawyer will emphasize that it is extremely unlikely that anyone is going to walk away having won completely. I’ve been told by many lawyers that they make most of their money from clients who are stubborn. But many lawyers also say that they would accept slightly lower fees for easier clients, even if they have to take on more clients to make up the difference.
Information about dispute resolutions and more is covered far more comprehensively in The Smart Divorce: Proven Strategies and Valuable Advice from 100 Top Divorce Lawyers, Financial Advisers, Counselors and Other Experts. Available wherever books are sold, amazon.com, amazon.ca, barnesandnoble.com and many other webseller book sites.
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March 22, 2008 at 5:49 pm
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